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Second Chances [4/?]

Title: Second chances [4/?]
Pairing: KyuMin, other pairings
Rating: PG-13
Genre: angst, romance, humor
Warnings: Character Death
Summary: When he died, Kyuhyun lost the will to live. Will he find it again after they're given a second chance?

A/N: sorry it took so long. ^^
Comments are loved.

EDIT:Oh and belated happy birthday to onetruemei. Sorry hindi kita na-greet kahapon.


The first emotion that Kyuhyun felt rushing though his veins was anger, pure hot anger that made him shoot up and glare at the stupid waitress who dared to ignore his Sungmin.

The second emotion that he felt was something he didn’t want to feel, something he didn’t think he would feel, and it took him so much by surprise that his mouth stopped functioning and his brain shut down as Heechul’s words replayed in his ears:

None of it is real.

That second emotion was doubt.

His eyes flickered to Sungmin, who looked just as angry and shocked as he had just been just a few seconds ago. Sungmin seemed real to Kyuhyun. The flush in his cheeks as he got angry was real, the soft hand that grabbed his shoulder and pulled him out of the restaurant was real. Sungmin is here. He is. He is. He is.

He just has to be.

Kyuhyun shut his eyes as he was dragged to who knows where. He just wanted to feel Sungmin’s touch fully, to confirm that he was really there, those familiar calluses on the fingers that he’d gotten from strumming on his guitar, the soft palm and the general warmth of the small hand wrapped around Kyuhyun’s wrist. It was real.

Right?

Just an hour ago he’d been crying because Sungmin was dead, and then the man himself had arrived and he’d been overjoyed. Had Kyuhyun accepted it far too quickly? Was this all just a hallucination like what had transpired the other day? Was Sungmin really dead?

None of this is real.

Kyuhyun didn’t notice when Sungmin stopped walking. He bumped into the shorter man and they both almost tumbled to the ground but they managed to brace themselves against the wall, with Sungmin pressed against it and Kyuhyun looming over him, both of his arms thrown out on both sides of Sungmin, caging him in. Neither of them noticed the compromising position they were in, or at least, Kyuhyun didn’t, as Sungmin only lowered his gaze to the ground.

None of this is real.

“You’re real.” Kyuhyun whispered softly, cupping Sungmin’s face in his hands, pressing the cheeks together.. “You’re real.” he said again, trying to convince himself that it was true.

Sungmin’s eyes flashed in anger.

“Don’t act like that!” he snapped, pushing Kyuhyun’s arms away and glaring up at Kyuhyun with challenging eyes. “It’s not like there’s even a possibility that I’m not real. This isn’t a video game Kyuhyun. We aren’t ’The Sims’ or anything like that. All those computer games you’ve been playing have rotted your brain!”

Sungmin huffed.

Kyuhyun stared at him with soft eyes begging for the other to be real while Sungmin only glared back, pouting with his arms crossed.

This has to be real.

Kyuhyun bowed his head.

“Mianhe, Min.”

He stepped forward and wrapped Sungmin in a tight hug.

“I shouldn’t have doubted.”

---

What Sungmin originally planned as a frivolously expensive lunch in an Italian restaurant ended up in their own kitchen, with Chinese takeout and chopsticks. Sungmin kept apologizing about breaking his promise about treating Kyuhyun out to lunch but Kyuhyun kept turning down the apologies. There was nothing to apologize for.

Kyuhyun was just glad that Sungmin was there.

“Are you sure this is alright Kyu? We could just try another restaurant you know.” Sungmin said as he slurped a noodle into his mouth.

Kyuhyun smiled fondly. “This is just fine, Min.”

Being with you is really all that I can ask.

“If you say so…” Sungmin trailed off, unsure.

Kyuhyun chuckled and he reached over to ruffle Sungmin’s hair. “You shouldn’t worry so much Minnie!”

“Ah! Don’t do that!” Sungmin yipped, leaning away. “I’m your Hyung!”

“That doesn’t matter!” Kyuhyun protested, setting his food on the table.

“Yah! It does matter Cho Kyuhyun! You should call me Hyung!” Sungmin put his food down too, sensing that Kyuhyun was up to some mischief.

“But the title ‘hyung’ doesn’t fit you!”

‘Love’ would fit better.

“What are you trying to say?!”

Do I love you Min?

“You should call me your hyung!”

Sungmin snapped.

The next thing that Kyuhyun knew, they were rolling around on the kitchen floor. A mass of flailing limbs, tousled hair, surprised hisses and high-pitched squeals (which Kyuhyun all credited to Sungmin because he would never ever squeal like that, or he didn’t think he did.) Although Kyuhyun was the bigger one of the two, Sungmin was stronger, and before long, he had Kyuhyun pinned to the ground with his knees.

“Aish! You’re heavy!!”

Sungmin’s eyes flashed and Kyuhyun realized fearfully that he’d said the wrong thing.

“I am not heavy!!!”

And then Kyuhyun was attacked by wriggling fingers and no matter how much he’d said in the past that he wasn’t ticklish, Sungmin had him writhing on the floor in no time as he roared in laughter.

“M-Minnie!” he choked in between giggles. “Stop!!!”

“Never!” The older man roared, targeting Kyuhyun’s belly.

They would have gone on like that for quite some time in which Kyuhyun was sure he would have grabbed the upper hand and would have straddled Sungmin instead of it going on the other way around, but then, he never had the chance to as a shrill voice rang through the dorms and they looked up in alarm.

“Kyuhyun! What the hell are you doing in there?!”

And Eunhyuk strides in, an irritated expression on his face and a glass of strawberry milk in one hand. Kyuhyun looks up from the floor and grins sheepishly at his hyung, he opens his mouth to explain but then a sudden funny feeling washed over him and he shuts his mouth again as a feeling of lightness descended over him. His heart sinks.

“What are you doing on the floor?”

Kyuhyun stands up and dusts himself off.

“Nothing.” he mumbles, eyes overcast. “Sorry if I disturbed you.”

Kyuhyun walks out.

Alone.

----

A week passes by and nothing gets better. Their goodbye stage was bittersweet, with the fans cheering them on and waving their banners, but Kyuhyun never really paid attention to any of those. He just really wanted to get home and do what he always did nowadays: sulk.

The members haven’t stopped shooting him worried looks but Kyuhyun just ignored them all. But sometimes they get so irritating that he just shuts himself inside his room and locks the door.

The frantic knocks that follow fall on deaf ears as he chooses to sink down into his bed and stare into nothingness instead of answering the door.

He just wished that he remembered that Eeteuk had the master key for the dorms.

“Kyuhyun, are you alright?” Eeteuk sidled into the room warily, eyes on the dark lump curled up in the wrong bed.

Kyuhyun groans and tugs Sungmin’s pink blanket over himself.

“Kyuhyun-ah.” Eeteuk comes closer and tries to pull the pink blanket away, instigating a tug war that threatened to rip the pink flimsy material.

“What?!” Kyuhyun grumpily demands once he’s lost and the blanket is now successfully piled up on the floor.

Eeteuk looks him in the eye and then his gaze roves over the bed that he’s on and Kyuhyun has the decency to blush even as his temper refused to disappear.

“I’m sorry.” Eeteuk says, and he averts his gaze as his picks up Sungmin’s pink blanket and folds it under his arms. “But, Sungmin’s parents are going to come over this Saturday.” he looks up and his gaze lingers on Sungmin’s pink guitar and at the sticker covered closet before his gaze lands on Kyuhyun again and Kyuhyun could practically feel the pity radiating from those eyes.

Kyuhyun thinks he understands what Eeteuk is trying to say but he still feels the great need to verify it.

“They’re going to take it all away…”

The older man nods, and looks away again.

“You’re going to have to help them pack.”

Kyuhyun closes his eyes and clenches his fist. Breathe in, breathe out, yes, he didn’t need to get mad all of a sudden. He had no right to anything of Sungmin’s anyway. It shouldn’t matter to him that his only memories of Sungmin were going to all be taken away in an instant by two people who looked and talked like the pink-loving man. It really shouldn’t.

He opens his eyes again and looks emotionlessly up at his hyung.

“Okay.”

Eeteuk nods again and then tethers on the edge of speech as Kyuhyun just continues to look at him till he gives up and walks out of the door, shoulders lower than they were when he’d entered.

Kyuhyun watches this happen unseeingly, and it’s only when the door closes that he begins to move again. He pulls the stuff toys surrounding him and Sungmin’s pillow to his chest and buries his face in them and doesn’t move even when Ryeowook comes in and puts a tray of food on his bedside table.

“Hyunnie, you should eat. I cooked this especially for you.” Ryeowook said.

Kyuhyun doesn’t respond.

----

It’s Thursday, three days after Kyuhyun first stopped eating that Eeteuk gets a visit from the Eternal Maknae.

“Hyung, I think we need to talk to Kyuhyun.”

Eeteuk looks up from his frost-white bed and rests his eyes on a fidgeting figure standing by the door frame. He sits up and beckons the other person forward. Ryeowook steps in and settles down on the bed, twiddling his fingers as he bit on his bottom lip.

“What is it Wookie? What’s wrong?” Eeteuk asks, as he smoothes the younger mans hair with a gentle hand.

“You’re not on our floor so you don’t notice it, but, he’s not eating anymore, Hyung. Even when I bring the food into his room, he doesn’t eat it.” Ryeowook grabs Eeteuk’s hands and looks up at him imploringly. “He doesn’t even play his video games anymore, Hyung! I’ve never seen him like that!”

Eeteuk is alarmed. Kyuhyun not playing video games? This was serious.

“What do you think we can say to him Wookie? He just lost someone very important to him…to us. Sungmin is just irreplaceable.” he could feel his emo-ness rearing up its ugly head.

“I know that. How can you think that I don’t know that? Sungmin was the strongest of us all. He never cried because he wanted to be strong for us. He just kept smiling even when he was always just at the background. I think he was just happy to see us shine and never desired to shine all by himself.” Ryeowook’s voice was beginning to break. “I know all that Sungmin was, Hyung. You don’t need to tell me that. What I have to know is what we can do for Kyuhyun. He’s the most affected, I think.”

Eeteuk nods. “I think so too.” He looks into Ryeowook’s eyes and smiles sadly. “Did you know that he never got to confess?”

Ryeowook’s eyes widened.

“But-but I thought that they were, together! You mean to tell me that…Sungmin-hyung never knew?”

Eeteuk shakes his head slowly.

“No, he never did.”

---

Sungmin stood disoriented outside the neighborhood grocery wondering how the hell he got there. Last he remembered, he was on the kitchen floor with Kyuhyun but now, he was out here, standing in the heavy rain.

‘Aish.’ he thinks as he tugs his soaked jacket around himself and shivers slightly in the cold open air. There’s no one around and the shops are beginning to close. He takes one look around the area before he shuffles away, head bent.

Sungmin just continues walking in his dorms direction, mind focused on getting out of the rain.

He doesn’t notice the bent blood-speckled lamp post that he passes by.

He hurries into his dorm building, breathing out a sigh of relief when nobody notices him dripping water all over the floor. He notices that there are bouquets of pink flowers lining the halls but he doesn’t pay attention to any of them, or to any of the candles left burning on the floor.

All he thinks is: “That’ll be a fire hazard.’ and he tries to avoid them as he runs toward the elevator door and presses the up button.

He’d have to ask Kyuhyun what all the candles and flowers were all about.

---

Kyuhyun was busy minding his own business, thank you very much, when the door suddenly opens without warning and someone walks in. He groans and buries his face in his pillows. He doesn’t want to be bothered by anyone for any reason.

“Go away.” he murmurs when he feels the presence stop at some place near his bed.

The person, whoever it is, doesn’t leave.

Not that Kyuhyun really expected the person to leave. It would just have been really nice.

“Awww, Kui Xian. You don’t really mean that do you?”

Wait.

Zhou Mi?

Kyuhyun peaks out from the side of his pillow and finds the tall man leaning over him with this large yes-I-know-your-bestest-friend-died-but-I-don’t-care-and-I-still-am-happy-and-have-care-in-the-world-right-now smile.

Or maybe that was just Kyuhyun’s imagination.

Because the next moment the smile had disappeared and there was a crease in between the older mans brows.

“Kui Xian?”

Kyuhyun groans and pushes himself off the bed and glares at Zhou Mi.

“What are you doing here?” he demands angrily, he didn’t need this right now.

The tall man moves to sit on the bed and Kyuhyun hesitantly lets him, “The others called me. They said that Kui Xian is sad.” Zhou Mi began drawing imaginary circles on the covers of Kyuhyuns bed.

“So?” the maknae bites out, he avoids looking at Zhou Mi and focuses on his eyes on the other side of the room, to the pink guitar lying forlornly against the cream wall.

He had a crush on Zhou Mi before, but that was just a crush, and it had disappeared quickly when he’d returned to Korea and found Sungmin waiting for him with his bright smile, which was smaller, yet much more beautiful than Zhou Mi’s.

“I thought I’d come over.” Zhou Mi says, looking up from his circle drawing and smiling again, “I thought I’d try to make you happy again.” his hand stops drawing circles and inches closer to Kyuhyun’s, he attempts to entwine their fingers together but the other draws away.

Kyuhyun stays silent and just looks down. He doesn’t like the way this is going.

“Kui Xian?”

“What do you want?” he snaps, still not looking at the other man.

“To make you feel better.” Zhou Mi says, not a hint of hurt in his voice.

“You won’t make me feel better. Now, go away. ” Kyuhyun says, and then he snuggles again under the blankets and turns his back to Zhou Mi.

“Kui Xian!”

“Go away.”

“Can’t I do anything to make you feel better.”

“You’re not Sungmin, Mi.”

“But Kui Xian! I thought we shared something! Something special!” Zhou Mi cried out, shaking the big lump lying on the bed.

Kyuhyun finds this declaration so surprising that he shoots up from the bed and stares incredulously at Zhou Mi.

“Something special?” he repeats in disbelief.

The Chinese man visibly wilts in front of him.

“So it wasn’t special?” he asks, and Kyuhyun slowly shakes his head.

“No, Mi. I’m sorry.” Kyuhyun says.

“Oh.” and then the awkward silence descends on them, with Zhou Mi twiddling his fingers as he stared unblinkingly at the ground and Kyuhyun stands up and attempts to pat the other man on the head but then settles for patting the shoulder instead because he couldn't quite reach.

“Sorry if I made you think it was something else…”

It took a moment for Zhou Mi to raise his eyes, but when he did raise them they were brimming with tears and Kyuhyun had to look away. “So it’s Sungmin then?” he asked.

Kyuhyun is frozen for a moment, but then he shakes his head and sighs. “Min and I weren’t together.”

“But you loved him, huh?” Zhou Mi asked, and Kyuhyun could practically hear the hurt seeping out of his voice.

The maknae looks away again and he thinks, he really thinks on this question. DID he really love Sungmin? Oh sure he loved to hear his hyung laugh, and he loved making his roommate smile because his smile was just so unique and well…special, but that didn’t mean he loved him right? Min-Hyung was just really special because he was adorable and yet he kicked-ass and he knew how to cook and he played the guitar and he -

Oh shit, who was he kidding? It had taken him five years to realize it but now he did know it, he did love Sungmin. He was deeply madly in love with the guy. Kyuhyun looks over to the pictures of them together which were taped to the mirror and he finds himself blinking back tears.

“Yes.” he breathes out, and a lone tear makes its way down his cheek even as a small smile spreads across his face. “Yes I think I did. I mean, I do. I really do.”

He hears the creaking of bedsprings and he rubs his eyes vigorously to get rid of the irritating wetness. He turns and surprisingly finds himself face to face with Zhou Mi.

“But he’s dead, Kui Xian.” the tall man says, and he grips Kyuhyun’s shoulders as if he wants to shake the other man but doesn’t quite manage to do even that because his own shoulders are shaking so much already due to his restrained sobs. “he’s gone. Flown up to heaven somewhere. Dead.”

“I know he’s dead, Mi.” Kyuhyun says, and he’s proud that his voice didn’t break when he said that.

“Then why don’t you let him go?”

And Zhou Mi’s voice sounds so far away as Kyuhyun zones out and he remembers Sungmin. His frown and his smile and the way his eyes flashed when you pissed him off. How could he let that go? How could he-

Suddenly Zhou Mi’s lips crash against his and his thought patterns stop.

It’s all warmth and soft skin and the feel of hands gliding down his back and the scent of Zhou Mi. Zhou Mi. And that was what was wrong.

Kyuhyun breaks out of the kiss and stumbles back, hands covering his mouth.

“What was what for?!” he yells, and Zhou Mi doesn’t move, doesn’t respond, he’s just staring at the ground with his hands fisted at his sides.

“I’m sorry.” the tall man mumbles.

Kyuhyun shakes his head, shakes his head once more, and then he runs out of the room breathless.
the dorms

This is wrong. This is Wrong. Sungmin not Zhou Mi. Sungmin. Sungmin. Sungmin! he chanted in his head as he ran past a crawling Yesung, a worried looking Eeteuk and a sleeping Ryeowook.

“But he’s dead Kui Xian….” Zhou mi’s voice echoed in his mind and he shook his head to get rid of it.

He didn’t need this right now. He needed silence, isolation, time to think. He wouldn’t get that here. He finally saw the door leading to the hallway outside and ran faster, afraid that Zhou Mi or Eeteuk would come chasing after him and pull him back.

He reached his hand out to open the doorknob, before he even reached the door, but then the door opened before he even got there and he was taken so much by surprise that he wasn’t able to stop running.

He collided right into the black-clad figure that had opened the door and the two fell to the ground with a strangled yell and a loud ‘Oof!”

“YAH! Get off!!!”

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!”

Kyuhyun quickly scrambled to his feet and then frantically bowed twice as he apologized to the other person and then ran off with the breath catching in his throat as the tears blurred his vision.


Behind him, Sungmin sat up and watched him leave with wide-eyes bewilderment.

"Kyuhyunnie...?"


----------------
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Comments

( 8 comments — Leave a comment )
babysuju
Nov. 7th, 2010 09:59 am (UTC)
uh-oh... I really want Sungmin to be back alive... will he? will he?
please, bring Sungmin back... n update soon, its gettin interesting!!
vin11lover
Nov. 7th, 2010 10:07 am (UTC)
now i confuse.. update so i can understand!! xDD
shiro_yuuki
Nov. 7th, 2010 11:36 am (UTC)
My god you updated!! Spot anyway, gonna read later
elfrulezforever
Nov. 7th, 2010 12:27 pm (UTC)
GOD I WANT SUNGMIN ALIVE NOW!!!
DON'T MAKE THIS STORY TURN TO QMI~~~
onetruemei
Nov. 7th, 2010 12:30 pm (UTC)
Oh, I just want to say thank you for greeting me! <3
And I didn't know you speak Filipino! LOL!! <3
Anyway! Yeah~!
I'll be reading this now... now to look for the last chapter.. :|
onetruemei
Nov. 7th, 2010 03:15 pm (UTC)
I really want to know how this will turn out.
I have this plot in mind that i know isn't happy, but I couldn't see it any other way around without involving magical powers and stuff so.. XD

I just hope Kyuhyun doesn't end up with anyone. >_>
casanova7
Nov. 7th, 2010 05:18 pm (UTC)
I never comment from the first chap, so now here I am.. :)
My guess: Sungmin is dead, true. But Min doesn't realize that he already dead. And he can not go to the heaven yet. Because Kyu is not letting him go, not yet. Until Kyu confess his feeling to Min, then Min will go to the heaven. Hehehe.
But actually I'm hoping that Min would live again ^^ And your title is "Second Chances" so I hope for some miracle that Min will live again :)
hime24
Nov. 9th, 2010 12:33 am (UTC)
I think this fic is fantastic. I hope you update soon.
( 8 comments — Leave a comment )

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